If Only....

I know, it almost sounds like I'm going to share a poem with you. Hate to break it to you; I'm just here to share my opinion/fact.

If only the world thought like me. You know how much easier things would be? For example, here in Idaho (a little slower than most places in America) driving here is such a pain. When I am 300 feet away from a 4-way stop sign intersection and someone else is already there stopped, they always wait for me to stop at my stop sign before proceeding. You know, if they just thought like me, I wouldn't have to wait at my stop sign for them to go through. That goes for pedestrians too.

Now, that didn't sound very eloquent, but if you were in the situation, you would understand how frustrating it is.

Okay, here's another example with pictures to help you understand. There is a huge sale at a store here and everything for the next week is under ten bucks. My sister likes the store, so I called her to look on the website to see if there was anything she wanted me to buy for her.

This is what she picked out:


And this is how I pictured the skirt on a human:

Pretty similar eh?

Her skirt was Ug. No offense to you personally sis, just your style in clothing.

If she could only see it my way, she would know that that skirt would look like a pair of parachute pants that accent the buttocks.

I have so many other examples, but honestly I just read what I already wrote and I almost fell asleep, so I won't bore you with anything else. However, I do want to get you excited on my upcoming fashion blog. My sister wants me to critique a few of her outfits. Just get excited for that!

No Desire? Bah! Yeah Right.

Out of the kindness of my heart, I offered to buy my sister some of these:

Let's take another look:

Her favorite candy. Delish don't you think?

And do you know what she said to that!

"No thanks, I don't even have the desire to eat those."

I couldn't help by roll my eyes in disgust. Who would turn down something like that?

Well, I did know that she and my mom were in a competition to see who could stay off sweets the longest. They invited me into this little game of theirs and even said the winner gets to go on a $50 shopping spree for a new outfit.

Now in my mind I'm thinking, "No sweets until someone breaks? Yeah, I don't think so. I'll be down $50 within the next week."

I lost a ton of weight after pregnancy, mostly because I was sick and didn't want to eat, but the doc told me that I need to eat more, increase my calories. Naturally I thought cookies, ice cream, and candy bars were the perfect way to add some calories to my diet. And then...

BAM! My rear got a little too big. Embarrassing enough, almost too big for my maternity jeans.

My kid has a nanny. And yes, she is a nanny. She and I are good friends and we decided to challenge each other in a no-cookie-or-ding-dong eating challenge. We gave ourselves one week. Whoever eats a cookie during that week has to make the other person a batch of cookies (I know, kinda defeats the purpose). Luckily my nanny ate a ding dong a couple days later and tried to hide it from me. Of course I found out. So we did double or nothing and added an extra week to the bet.

That was two weeks ago.

So, today I walked down the candy aisle because oddly enough it is in the same aisle as the bread. And you know what I said in my head? "No thanks. I don't have the desire."

I even made a Vegetarian Lasagna today.

And now I have to admit to my sister and mother that they were right. Eating more healthy foods feels better.

Just a little update: My mom and sister (more my sister) did end up eating those m&ms. Nearly the entire bag.

What Do Men Think? I Know All the Answers

Story: Last week in my Chinese class, instead of talking about Chinese literature we talked about the Honor Code at BYU-Idaho. Let me just give you my thoughts on it before I expound on what other people said. Follow it; if you don't like it, leave. That's about it.

The argument was about the same old thing that people argue about every time. Why can't I have a beard? What's wrong with wearing shorts? I'm 25 and unmarried. Why do I need a curfew?

I can't grow a beard, my legs are too hairy and white to wear shorts, and I'm married so I don't have a curfew. I can see how this can be frustrating to some people. But get this. You can grow a beard over your break, wear shorts on the weekends, and you get more sleep at night if you are in earlier. What's the big deal? Stop whining about it already. Go to BYU. They let everything slide there.

My teacher came in the next class period and told us a story. He was walking to his car and he saw a girl wearing a tight shirt that said "Bad Kitty" on it with a skull and cross bones. Combine those with jeans and she is technically dressed according to honor code. (However, I don't know if anyone has the audacity to wear that into a church building). In any case, modest fitting capris and a button up shirt is against the dress code. Hmmm....

Now, I am the only female in my Chinese class now. These gentlemen were talking about how girls kinda dress slutty without knowing it. One guy said, "If only girls knew what guys thought, they wouldn't dress that way". But don't worry; I know.

Okay, maybe I don't REALLY know. But I do know a few things. First of all, don't wear a low cut shirt. Guys eyes to a low cut shirt are like flies attracted to light. No matter where the fly is, he will always move to the light even though I'm standing there with my fly swatter. Maybe that was a bad example since I'm horrible with a fly swatter and never kill any bugs. But it's still a dangerous situation.

Don't wear things to tight. Nobody wants to see your skin folds. Now, unless you are anorexic, you have skin folds. Everyone does. And if you're anorexic, nobody wants to see your bones.

Short shorts and belly shirts? Don't make me vomit. College folk are too old for that "Fashion". It's out of style. Get over it.

So, I don't know what guys think and frankly, I NEVER want to know. And trust me, you don't have to dress like my grandma. There are still fashionable ways to look sexy but not a slut. I mean, look at me. Aside from my maternity pants, I am a fashion eye-con!

Okay, I'm An Idiot

So, I recently (by recently I mean the blog I just posted 30 minutes ago) complained about a couple of teachers that didn't allow me to add their class because of a 15 minute overlap. Well, I have a confession to make:

Okay, so there was another class, the same one, open on Tuesday/Thursday so now I can take all the classes that I need.

But, I'm not as big of an idiot as I sound. I could have sworn that class was just added. Maybe the school read my blog about how mad I was and added another class. Yeah, that must be the reason.

I was thinking about deleting the other post so I didn't sound like such a retard, but I figured someone will get a laugh out of my stupidity.

Okay, It's Time to Complain

Really mad right now. Okay, I'm not ridiculously mad. Just really frustrated. You know what really sucks about changing your major more than half-way through college? Signing up for classes. Usually people pick a major before they start college and take their major classes with their general ed. That way they can sign up for their major classes and fill in the gaps with the hundreds of general ed classes available. I chose to do it a different way.

Before I went on a mission, I completed all my general ed classes and took some classes in my Math major. When I came home, I changed my major to Biology and it has been a pain in the butt.

I love biology. But the thing that really is awful about being a biology major at my school is that signing up for classes is a pain in the butt. I could tell you the long story, but it will just make me really mad. Here's the short version:

After hours of trying to figure out my classes, I had the perfect schedule for me to graduate on time. However, two classes overlapped by 15 minutes! You know what that means? That 15 minutes of time has cost me and extra semester in college.

I'm trying not to be bitter towards the two teachers that shot down my proposal of missing 7 1/2 minutes of each of their classes. Big deal. I don't pay attention to the last 10 minutes anyway.

I'm done telling my story, but I'm still mad and rambling and venting helps me calm down and prevents me from swearing.

I went on a jog today. I'm out of shape.

I can't stop thinking about how mad I am. I need to calm down. I guess an extra semester will be fun. I mean, what's wrong with just staying in Rexburg an extra 4 months? I have an extra 4 months to update my "In and Around Rexburg" blog. And paying an extra semester of tuition? Eh. Lots of people go to college for 7 years. Oh, and don't forget the extra semester I get to pay for a nanny. I mean, I love having someone work for me. I'm finally a boss.

Okay, I fell better now.

My First Trip to Goodwill

This may come as a surprise to you, but I'm allergic to Goodwill. No really. I am.

I went on a nice trip to CA where I spent time with my fam. On a routine trip to Costco, I was forced by my sister and sister-in-law to stop by Goodwill. They promised me that we would only be in there for 10 minutes. Little did I know...

Okay, confession: I almost liked it.

So back to me being allergic. I really am. I couldn't stop sneezing, crying, and rashing up.

Confession: I actually bought stuff. By me buying stuff, I mean, I didn't have my wallet on me and my sister bought it and I totally forgot to pay her back. My bad Amanda. I'll get that money to you.

Moral of the story is, Goodwill is actually a good store. Now, in Rexburg, used clothes are not desirable because people don't donate their clothes until their worn thin with holes in them. However, Goodwill in CA? Not bad.

Okay, that story was really boring. Sorry.

What's wrong with me? Had a baby and now I tell boring stories about Goodwill.