Sorry for the lame alliteration. I thought of it this morning and when trying to think of something actually clever, this was the only thing that kept coming to mind.
All my life, I have always been the super skinny girl. Not a problem for me. I just can't eat that much. From the day I started school as a Kindergarten kid though high school, I pretty much only ate half of a peanut butter sandwich for lunch. I was very satisfied and almost even full some days when I stuffed the whole thing down instead of stopping when I was satisfied. If there was anything else in my lunch like fruit or, better yet, fruit snacks, I would usually have to skip out on my peanut butter sandwich just in case I was going to explode.
High school was nearly seven years ago and not much as changed since then. My husband and I both don't eat very much. We share a meal when we go out to dinner and still have leftovers. Every recipe that I find online or that a friend gives me, I half it. Even then, we still have enough for the next day and the day after that before we get sick of it and throw it away.
Life as a pregnant woman has opened my eyes to a whole new world: a world where I need a constant stream of food coming to my mouth. Here's the thing though. I think I eat the same amount that I did before, but I have to spread it out throughout the day. I can't sit down and eat a whole plate of food anymore. After 5 or 6 bites, I am stuffed full and have to wait 30 minutes and two bathroom trips before I can scarf anymore down.
Going back to my eyes opening... It didn't hit me that I was going to get big as a pregnant lady until I was about 5 months pregnant and I went into a bathroom stall. I did my normal walk into the stall thing, but then something happened. I couldn't close the door. What? Me? Too big to fit into a bathroom stall? It was true. That day, I gained a whole new respect for my dear overweight friends. Now I resort to only using the handicap stalls.
For those of you who are still skinny and have never had this problem, let me tell you, not being able to close a stall door is hard. There is a lot of maneuvering and crouching over the toilet in "pee position" just to get the door shut. Don't even dream about having clothing with ties in the back because those babies will just take a little unwanted dip in the toilet.
As my pregnancy days started to pass, I felt really FAT. I know that I'm not and I am still pretty petite for a pregnant lady, but boy, those hormones make me think otherwise. My wedding ring still fits. Occasionally it even feels loose. I still fit into all my shoes with no unattractive ankles pouring over the edges. My pregnancy weight is right on track. No evidence of any triple chins or thunder thighs. Just the same me with some handles on the side and a basketball under my shirt.
But it's days like these when my shirt feels a little tighter than usual that makes me paranoid that I am becoming the Goodyear blimp that really get to me. I have a Clinique face lotion that I use every morning (or afternoon) before I put on my makeup. I always use to use just one pump to cover my entire face. Today that one pump just didn't go very far. After covering my cheeks, I ran out! I had to use two pumps today! Great, now my face is getting fat.
The whole point of this is because I have a whole new realization of how those girls in high school and college felt. You know, those girls that just weren't perfect model types; the ones that use two pumps of lotion on their face instead of one. It always bugged me how those girls would complain about their fatness when they weren't fat at all! They each had perfect little bodies, but something in their mind made them think they were fat.
I guess this is my public apology to all those girls who would complain to me about how they thought they were fat. I am sorry for all the times I rolled my eyes at you or laughed in your face for thinking you were crazy. I feel the same way now too. I feel plump. But let's face it, we are crazy because we really aren't fat.
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