This past week, I have been swamped with finals and I have to admit that the phrases doing the dishes, wash your clothes, and eat food seem to no longer be part of my vocabulary. But this week, I have expanded my vocabulary and I am willing to share with you a few things that helped my busy life (or replace busy with lazy because these tips will help either way).
1. Haven't done the dishes in a week? Yep, I've been there before. Don't worry. Here are some new phrases for you to learn to make the next week you don't do dishes a little easier.
a. Paper plates and plastic utensils- Now, you can use these to prevent the dishes from piling up, or do what I do: start using them after the dishes are all gone.
b. Stop eating- not eating=no dishes!
c. When the time actually comes to washing your dishes, wash one side of the sink first, then the other instead of top to bottom. I find it helpful.
d. Air Fresheners.
2. Don't have time to shower? That's okay. I know a thing or two on how to make your freshness last just a day or two longer.
a. It's important NOT to do ANY housework whatsoever. Especially the dishes. Limiting these activities will decrease any chances of unwanted sweat and any transferred odors.
b. DEODORANT- feel free to apply liberally like up and down your arm instead of limiting it to the 4-square-inch area called the arm pit.
c. Baby wipes- your rear will stay super fresh after dropping the kids off at the pool that there is almost no need to shower in the first place! Then you can remove "itchy bum" from your vocabulary indefinitely.
d. When someone at work notices that your showers are becoming few and far between, feel free to use the excuse that your cold water pipes froze and you couldn't shower unless you wanted to burn to death (or vice versa). Warning: this excuse does not work if you live in Texas, Arizona, or California. It never really drops below 70 there, so that excuse is not believable.
3. Get hungry in the middle of the night or sick of going to the bathroom ever hour while you're sleeping? (This is mostly for your pregnant ladies out there)
a. Straws- I always get thirsty in the middle of the night but I do have trouble drinking from a glass while laying down. You see, when I use a straw, I can still lay down and therefore can go back to sleep faster.
b. Toast- toast is pretty much the only thing that I can eat without getting heartburn, but who wants to walk all the way down to the kitchen, get out bread, wait for it to be toasted, butter it, then go back to bed to eat it? Simple solution: bring the toaster into the bedroom, get a paper towel, knife, butter, and you got it! You can make a meal in bed!
c. Depends adult diapers don't really sound that appealing to me even though I am still tempted everyday to buy some. Just the thought of sleeping in my own... you know what, just makes me think of itchy bums. I remember my grandma had this really cool looking pot under her bed. I loved to look at it because I thought it was so pretty. Little did I know the real use for it until I woke up in the middle of the night to a little ruckus when she left her door open. I regret sneaking that peak, but let's just say, I never looked at that pot again. However, having a pee pot under your bed means that you don't have to walk all the way to the bathroom!
That's all the advice for now. However, if you feel that you are putting too much effort into something, shoot me a comment! I'll let you know an easier solution and help you add those new phrases to your vocabulary!
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